South Africa the last couple of weeks

You know you're in a South African summer when.....

*The best parking place is determined by shade
 instead of  distance.
*Hot water now comes out of both taps.
*You learn that a seat belt buckle makes a pretty
 good branding  iron.
*The temperature drops below 35 degrees and you
 feel a little chilly.
*You discover that in February it  only takes 2
 fingers to steer your
 car.
*You develop a  fear of metal car door handles.
*You break a sweat the  instant you step outside at
 06:30am
*Your biggest  bicycle-accident fear is,  "What if I
 get knocked out and
 end up lying on  the pavement and cook to death?"

*You realise that asphalt has a liquid state.
*Farmers are feeding their chickens crushed ice to
 keep them from laying
 hard-boiled eggs.
*The cows are  giving evaporated milk.
*The trees are whistling for the  dogs.